Trickshot was distracted as he stepped up to the podium. He was at the San Francisco branch of Star Trekish Labs. He could tell the squat little man with glasses was not very pleased that Tricky was the Legionnaire speaking to the press. Doctor Peacock grimaced when Trickshot and his lady friend arrived fifteen minutes before the scheduled event. Tricky did not care. As the world famous ‘Annoying Archer’, Carl Bastion prided himself in bothering the stuffy types.
“Well, I ain’t any good at given’ speeches, but I lost the coin toss an’ Hatman told me ta do it, so here I am.” The lovely blonde whom accompanied Trickshot just shook her head in slight disgust. She was sitting in the front of the crowd. Carl looked down at her and she replied with a smirk.
“I just wanna say thank you from the entire Lair Legion. These little dolls are . . .”
Doctor Peacock interrupted him with a cough. “LCMBs.”
“What?”
“They’re called Little Clone Meta Bodies. LCMBs. Each miniature Legionnaire has all the programmed skilled and duplicated abilities of the originals.” The doctor rolled his eyes in frustration. “They’re templates. If a Legionnaire dies, one of these can take their place.”
One of the reporters spoke up, trusting her microphone into the air. “Doctor Peacock! What about the Manga Shoggoth or The Man Who Wasn't There? Do those LCMBs have their abilities too?”
“Some. . . liberties were taken. We obviously couldn’t duplicate the Shoggoth.”
Another reporter spoke up, “Does the mini-Yuki have a mini-human brain or is she all robot?”
“Like I said, some liberties were . . .”
“Wait a minute.” Something must have sunk into Trickshot’s head. “Those toys can do what us Legionaries can do? Huh! Well what do ya know?” Carl stepped over to the display and held up the miniature version of him. Panic crossed Doctor Peacock’s face. The short man moved to the purple and green archer but it was too late. Carl tried to pose the miniature figure into one of his famous archer poses but both arms popped right off. The press started to all talk at once while the air was filled with the blinding flashes of several cameras.
“Whoops. Sorry Doc. Guess they’re not as durable as the originals. ‘Little Carl’ broke like so much junk.”
Doctor Peacock flushed as the startled press and his fellow technicians all launched questions. “Wait. No! You people don’t understand! Last night one of our janitorial staff ruined the whole exhibit! I didn’t have time to cancel the press conference!”
“So you faked the whole gift to the Legion with dolls?” Trickshot’s leggy blonde friend asked. “Were you ever going to say something?” The crowd turned to the woman. She was dressed in a blue and white legless leotard with very long sleeves that extended outward. Her face was covered with a black mask that had blue stripes. She had on blue boots, a dark blue sleeveless jacket and a black choker. Tight blue fishnets finished the ensemble.
“No I . . . ah, well that IS I thought we could . . . Listen! It was Dunder’s fault! Rob Dunder! He’s the night janitor. I don’t know what happened because last night’s storm shut down the cameras, but the LCMBs were reduced to melted slag when I got in this morning. It’s Dunder’s fault!”
A hot blast of fire engulfed the podium. Trickshot leaped out of the way while the blonde woman pushed Doctor Peacock to the ground. The press and technicians scattered. Some brave reporters and photographers lurked near the exits to better catch what was going on.
A strangely dressed man with dark green skin on the right half of his face and yellow skin on the left half hovered in the air. Smoke blew from his mouth, revealing that it was he who fired the blast. The strangest thing that everyone could not help but notice was that the entire right half of the man looked like Hatman while the left half looked like CrazySugarFreakBoy! His weird face twisted into an evil sneer. “Don’t you DARE blame me, Peacock! I didn’t cause the lightning to go through the window and zap those statues! I’m glad it did, though!”
“Rob? What happened to you?” the doctor asked.
“An’ why the %^$# do you look like Jay and Dream?”
Moving at superhuman speed, Rob Dunder flew to a wall and pulled a chunk free. He laughed like a madman. “I used Foom’s shape shifting to look like those losers because I want everyone to look at their faces and know fear! Those statues filled me with their power!” He sped towards the three people. “The combined strength of Epitome, Donar, Fin Fang Foom, Banjoooo, Sersi and some of the others is more than a match for you!”
He dropped the chunk of wall but one of Trickshot’s explosive-shock arrows blew it back in his face. Rob created a shield made from Exile’s extra-dimensional energy. He turned invisible, then sped around to hit each of them square on the head.
“Hey! No fair!” Trickshot yelled as he started to get up. He reached down to pick up his blonde companion. “You ok Deana?”
She got to her feet. “It’s Pretty Bird when I’m in costume handsome.”
Rob turned visible again and stood defiantly. “Give up archer. I’ve got your skill with the bow and arrow.”
Doctor Peacock stammered an interruption. “Actually, you don’t.”
“What?”
“I kind of lied before. We couldn’t duplicate any of the skills. Skills are learned. Listen Rob . . .”
Jarvis cosmic, mixed with Multiversal energy flared from Rob’s body. “Don’t call me that! Rob was a failure! With all this power I can be something! Call me the Composite Hatman!”
Pretty Bird smirked. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
“Excuse me?”
“You’ve got all that power and that’s what you call yourself?”
“Hey dweeb.” Trickshot smiled as he aimed an arrow. “Use Ziles’ telepathy to read my mind. I’ve got a better name.”
“Don’t piss off the bad guy, lover boy. He could still squash you.”
“Not on a good day beautiful.” Trickshot and Pretty Bird had positioned themselves in front of the doctor. He was shaking so bad that his glasses almost fell down from his nose.
The Composite Hatman threw back his head and laughed. “I did use her telepathy. Turned out I only have abilities from twenty-seven Legionaries. Still far beyond you.”
“That’s very true.” Pretty Bird continued. “But there’s still something I don’t understand. Before you atomize us with your fire breath, please tell us how you can simply use those powers without first learning about them?”
Rob looked at her with a blank expression across his by-colored face. She continued. “You’ve got Al B. Harper’s intellect and the Librarian’s thirst for information. How can you be satisfied with just being powerful? Why aren’t you off somewhere, trying to discover what you can do and who you truly are?”
“I don’t . . . wait. You’re correct. Just how many abilities do I have? How do they work? Is it possible to combine them? Yes woman. Before I enact my revenge upon you simple beings, I must discover who I am.” He teleported straight up into the air and hovered there a moment. His body radiated with Extra-dimensional, Multiversal, Jarvis Cosmic and Yo-Being energies. “I will go elsewhere and discover who I am. Beware heroes. I will return one day.”
“Why wait till later? I’ve got an arrow fer you right now!”
The Composite Hatman ignored the archer’s taunt. His eyes flashed golden as he disappeared.
“I coulda taken him.”
“Sure lover. Let’s head back to the mansion and you can tell me all about it.”
End, for now.
WHO’S WHO ENTRY
When disgruntled janitor Rob Dunder was cleaning the San Francisco branch of Star Trekish Labs, lighting struck the small clone statues of the Lair Legion that he was standing by. The force of nature endowed him with several abilities. Now, his mind and body forever altered, he took the name Composite Hatman and set out for space to learn what he can do. His goal, to destroy the Lair Legion, especially Hatman and CrazySugarFreakBoy! He uses his shape shifting abilities to make the right half of his body look like Hatman and the left to look like CrazySugarFreakBoy!
He has the following abilities; Enhanced agility (CSFB), enhanced speed (CSFB), enhanced reflexes (CSFB), hat design to ability (Hatman), probability alteration (Dancer), knowledge absorption and release (Librarian), super strength (Mr. Epitome), super speed (Mr. Epitome), super senses (Mr. Epitome), super reflexes (Mr. Epitome), invulnerability (Mr. Epitome), super genius (Al B. Harper), really strong hands (ManMan), teleportation (Goldeneyed), Yo-being ability to be whatever he thinks (Yo, he’s not even aware of this power), Multiversal energy manipulation (Amazing Guy), Jarvis Cosmic (Jarvis), extra-dimensional fern manipulation, dragon fire breath (Fin Fang Foom), dragon strength (Fin Fang Foom), dragon flight (Fin Fang Foom), dragon shape shifting (Fin Fang Foom), dragon durability & cell regeneration (Fin Fang Foom), Sea Monkey strength (Banjoooo), Sea Monkey laser eyes (Banjoooo), Sea Monkey size changing (Banjoooo), Sea Monkey enhanced swimming (Banjoooo), Sea Monkey underwater durability (Banjoooo), Ausgardian stamina (Donar), Ausgardian strength (Donar), Ausgardian durability (Donar), Ausgardian immortality (Donar), GAH Force manipulation (Starseed & Space Ghost), matter manipulation (Sersi), durability & immortality (Sersi), extra-dimensional energy manipulation (Exile), Amazonian strength (Troia 215), Amazonian speed (Troia 215), Amazonian reflexes (Troia 215), Amazonian durability (Troia 215), invisibility (Ziles), telepathy (Ziles), upward teleportation (dull thud), flight (Nats), magnetic manipulation (Magnetic Techbird), flying horse shape shifting (Pegasus), force blasts (Pegasus), flight (Pegasus), super speed (De Brown Streak), and healing by taking on or transferring others wounds (Uhunalura).
This story is written and copyrighted (C) 2007 by Scott Bryan (also known as AG), and may not be
reprinted without permission.
Scott
ag aka muse-slave aka Jack_Roberts aka just 'Scott'
My blog, THE BLOG OF THE NIGHT CHILDREN.
Come see!
Scott
ag aka muse-slave aka Jack_Roberts aka just 'Scott'
My blog, THE BLOG OF THE NIGHT CHILDREN.
Come see!
Posted from U.S. Company using Microsoft Internet Explorer 7/Windows XP
